I’ve done this – which applies to introverts, empaths, INFJ types 1,000% – so many times I can’t count!
I’m NOT a phone person. I don’t want people to call. I don’t want messages. I don’t even want notifications of messages!
This quotation jumped out at me when I saw it posted in the ether some time ago… It rings so very true for me. I couldn’t say whether it is a result of an empathic heart, INFJ tendencies, or the heavily-leaning introverted side of a potentially ambiverted personality. . .
My solitude is my sanity, and there are times when I must shut out all but what my body does involuntarily – my beating heart, and a chest which rises and falls like the tides, my sole companions.
For a long, long time, the thought of anyone in my space bordered on “terrifying.” It was not specifically a fear of loss, whether to freedom, or privacy, or presence…but more that my soul needed the expanse in which to re-calibrate and recharge. It felt almost like an affront to my very essence to have someone impede spatially in my life – as if I had no sanctuary my own.
I’m still a lot like a lone wolf, but there is one person with whom I am blessed beyond rhyme and reason to have in my life. And he…he won me over so much so that his presence challenged my comfort zone…and single-handedly defeated it.
I once was nocturnal. And frankly, I loved it… Nothing is better than the wee hours of the night – humans are sleeping, magic is unfolding. . . Ahhh. My unconventional, witchy self always leaned a bit renegade…so the space and time to manage mischief was perfection.
But…after college, those days came quickly to a halt – thank you, grown-up-hood.
I need my sleep. I need LOTS of it. And I’m so restless that if I DON’T get to bed early, I’m going to be a zombie. Likely a belligerent or over-trained one, which is woe-to-the-planent territory.
It isn’t because I’m “old” either – I joke about that but age really IS just a number. I feel healthy and happy…but sleep is a big part of that. Not partying, drinking, and smoking is another. (I can add in “not being in crowds engaging is such activities,” also, as that would very much result in my NOT feeling healthy. Or happy!)
So this gave me a solid laugh…
Empaths, INFJ types, you will probably laugh silly. Moms and dads might also, or really any regular working stiff. 😉
Is this in the dictionary? Another laugh-out-loud one for all you introvert, INFJ, or socially-averse individuals!
(PS, I maintain I’m an introvert with ambiverted tendencies. Growing up performing gave me a sense of ease when I need to be in a crowd…but they’re also massively draining for me, even when with loved ones, and I DEFINITELY do this. . .)
And I’m not alone!
As an Empath I feel sympathy to the Nth degree – to the point that I can empathize with a smurf! I’m not kidding either – cartoons, fictional films or books…doesn’t matter. My emotions are FULL ON, and have been so attuned since childhood. It takes a seriously concerted effort for me to disconnect and observe without feeling deep compassion. I also love to give back, as do many of those around me.
That said…I am ALSO the same person that might go bananas if you double park or didlly-dally when the rest of us have somewhere to be. Loud neighbors, that’s another one… I get the stare-O-death (same one my Southern Italian mother is notorious for), boiling blood, and a highly irascible tone (probably the better end of my wanting to snap my fingers and have humanity disappear.)
It’s a downright conundrum. I simultaneously believe in beauty everywhere, and the infinitely generous things people are capable of. And then there’s a part of me that sees laziness, anger, taking advantage…which makes me view humanity as a plague. . .
Which is it?
We have the power to create and destroy, terrifying that may be. Being an Ambiverted Introvert gives me the option, I suppose, to choose which side of things I’m on during any given day. (I *try* to stick to positive, don’t worry…but I will also never claim to be miss sugar-and-peace all the time. Thankfully I’m a Gemini also…I can point the finger to the Stars! 😉 )