Martial Arts Humor – How To Catch A Ninja

They don’t teach you this in Ninjutsu.  I feel like – though – it’s common sense to be mindful of bubble wrap… The stuff can really render your skills null and void.

I feel like I’m constantly telling the kids to “watch your neighbor!” or “where’s that Ninja awareness?!”  COMMON SENSE when you are learning the Art of the most stealthy stalkers in history.  You would *think.*

I mean you could be quieter than silence itself, but your sleeping Samu opponent – who may have preemptively been to Mailboxes or the UPS store – might already have you one-upped.

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(C) Sunny Street Max Garcia

Watch your step, Ninja Master…lest your popping footfall announce you before you strike.

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Martial Arts Humor – Unnecessary Injury

It isn’t exactly funny. . .but interesting that there are so many memes about this!

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I’ve been talking about this a lot lately – I simply have no interest in partnering with students who want to go full-bore.  The purpose of my training is to learn techniques, to replicate them properly in order to create the correct muscle memory.  I’m NOT interested in going bananas, and cranking my partner’s limbs…OR my own!

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Don’t get me wrong, rolling, kicking, sparring, punching…at your full potential is great too, of course! – but this is more with respect to when we are specifically training techniques.  I see (and sadly have FELT) rushing far more than I’d personally like – you can’t go at a snail’s pace for sure, but unless you solidly have the technique, it’s important to be mindful.  

When you are in a class and learning techniques designed not only to lock joints, but flat-out BREAK them, staying in FULL CONTROL of your body and movement is integral.

Along with that? Keeping yourself tidy – again, mindfulness – so that you don’t put your partner at unnecessary risk (yes, I have had my face gouged my nails. “Ugh, your DNA is under my nail!” my partner said.  My response wasn’t so cheeky, as I wiped the blood off my face.)  Cleanliness and grooming matter when you are in a close contact sport.

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These days, I’d rather say, “slow down,” “hold looser,” or “dude, maybe you want to partner with someone else.” 

More substantial – avoidable – injuries?  NO THANKS!

Martial Arts – Always Learning

Exactly the attitude I think everyone should have – not only in Martial Arts, but in Life.

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Our learning never ceases – we will never know it all, and we can always take something positive (and useful!) away from each individual we work with.  

From teaching children to helping a student new to Martial Arts (or just your specific one), we can always learn something we didn’t know before – truly, it is limitless.

Stay humble, with an open mind, and the knowledge will flow.

 

Battle Bruises

The other day my training partner and I started laughing in the middle of a mount technique – She is awesome about “staying heavy” and totally crushed me from her mount. My chest was beyond sore from class the day before and there was something ridiculously comical about the fact that I could scarcely move (not to mention remember what the heck we were doing!)  I couldn’t quite laugh without groaning from the discomfort but I think most of us in there air on the side of finding humor in the ass-kicking we give ourselves – self-imposed after all!

We kept at it – myself, I have to say, firing on less than all pistons.  I don’t like to half-ass anything but my body was just too exhausted and sore to be as optimal as I’d have liked.  Off we go into another technique and… *PiNcH!* A trap and roll gi grab produced a lovely, almost-instantaneous heart-shaped bruise on my inner arm.  Ahhh… LOVE!

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A few minutes later I managed to totally slam my elbow to the mat.  I’m not sure if it was the impact, or the additional rolling over it by another body but within seconds I knew I’d have another battle wound (really racking them up that day!)

I love being a Martial Arts practitioner and though some days are rough-and-tumble (literally!  “Throw week” is one I look forward to less than, let’s say, small joint manipulation or weapons)…it is very much par for the course.  

A training partner at Ninjutsu the other day was totally out of it – I was admittedly frustrated by the spaciness and unwillingness to at least try.  Some days your body has less power, but you can still make the (mindful!) effort.  At one point he said “don’t really do it” about the block-and-striking technique we were working on at that moment.  Now, with two damaged knees I am the FIRST person to say “go easy,” or “let’s walk through this as we learn, without going to hard.”  But the reality is…you are in a Martial Arts class!  

You aren’t going to leave completely unscathed.  That doesn’t  mean you can’t train smart – you absolutely can (frankly, that’s ALWAYS my goal.)  Still…bumps and bruises happen.  You are going to need to accept that there will be some injuries (hopefully nothing major, however, which I’ve also endured.)  Martial Arts aren’t for the faint of heart by any stretch so it is important to know what you are getting into.  For me…I love to wear my heart on my sleeve…or my biceps! 😉  

My goal is to train as intelligently as I can so my partner and I get through with just a bunch of sore muscles at most.  But…when those bumps and bruises happen, I wear them like jewelry because I’m pretty darn sure I was working hard when I got them!  (I hope tomorrow when I go to try on bridal gowns, the wedding ladies don’t cringe too much! *lol*)

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For more of my Marital Arts and Dance jazz…

Martial Arts Humor – New Techniques

I don’t know about you, but when my 76 year-old Grandmaster does a technique flat-out, or shows us a new one…this is pretty much right on (thanks, The Hangover! 😉 )   

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I might ALSO mutter “beautiful….just beautiful! because, to me, Martial Arts is much like dance.  A deadly dance, absolutely…but dance all the same, pairing fluidity and grace with devastating coordination and control.

There’s something incredibly special about watching someone “fluent” in the language – so well versed that countless techniques present themselves with one move of the opponent.  Phenomenal. ❤

Martial Arts Humor (for Ladies) – Leggings

Part of me loved this because I was a dancer – working in the Fashion Industry left ZERO time for anything beyond my very tight routine of work, more work, dance, eat, sleep….repeat.

I wore leggings to the office most days, and simply changed into my dance shoes when I got to the studio – I had enough time to stretch and that was it!  

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As a Martial Artist, I can also appreciate the wonderful flexibility of leggings…  Wearing them as “pants” works well as a defensive technique – Come at me in the street and my “pants” can flex so much that you will end up with the ball of my foot under your chin, in your teeth, or at the side of your head.

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How about THAT?

Sorry, jeans.  You’re fun, and you can be hot, but…I like my ROM*!

(*Range of motion. 😉 ) 

Selfie Silliness

I wonder if there is a term for taking a group selfie.  I hate the word “selfie” to be completely honest, but I suppose it’s just the way of the world these days.  I’m not actually sure what you’d call what my friends and I take, but they’re maybe more on par with “sillies.”  Can we add that to the dictionary too?  It’s so much more positive sounding (and definitely less narcissistic!)  

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Blooper Reel

My friends and I are always laughing, even when we are working our buns off at the gym.  Maybe that’s what’s so funny – we are all panting, huffing, and puffing, but still pushing through as if we have more steam….which sometimes we don’t.  When we tucker out, one of us might chime in with “EXCUSE ME?!”...as in “and just what the hell do you think YOU are doing stopping?!”  Inevitably whichever one of us is being scolded will offer up an “oh really?!  I am working my ass off!  You want to come over here!?”

Therein lies a whole other layer of humor – one of us is a purple belt in Jiu-Jitsu, with multiple high ranks in MMA and fighting Arts.  One of us is a 3rd Degree in Taekwondo.  I’m a 2nd Degree in Taekwondo and Hapkido, and working on Ninjutsu and JiuJitsu…and there are a bunch more folks studying ground fighting and boxing. So if we really did go at it (which we won’t, of course) it would be incredibly entertaining.  

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Maybe not *quite* as cool as watching Holly Holm take Rhonda down (sorry, I’m NOT sorry, she needed to be checked!) or as Nate choking out Mr. McGreggor… But it would gather a crowd! 

As I’ve said so many times, physical activity isn’t always easy, even when your passion is very much tied to it.  Having fun while you are at it, and engaging with people who have similar goals, upbeat attitudes, and the ability to push you when you need to kick in the rump…it can make all the difference in you keeping it up.