Without The Darkness, And Without The Storms…

Some days are good, many are great, and some feel insurmountably uphill. I really do try my best to see the world as “I’m thankful I have a glass” as opposed to “it’s half empty or half full,” because I actually do harbor that much gratitude – life is a gift on every level.

On the tough days, though, I give myself so hard a time it’s nigh unconscionable. While I have uncovered the part I had to play in some disastrous situations of the past, it is also important to remember that I didn’t deserve bad things…and neither was I the cause. It is important that we ALL remember that – we are nothing more than a bundle of experiences and lenses colored by those experiences. It isn’t always easy to step back – recovery takes a lifetime, not just a handful of years.

It’s also important to be gentle with ourselves for our shortcomings – many of which, I daresay, we are neither proud of nor want! Frankly, I’d love to not have some of the conditioned responses I have. As a person who knows I have a choice in everything surrounding ME (my attitude, my actions, my inactions, my REactions, my responses…) it frustrates me to the hilt that I am unable to “will away” the things I do that I can’t stand. That said, I’m also not less of a person because I struggle…and neither are you.

While I am acutely aware that without a “yang” there is no “yin,” I sometimes need a reminder. A friend today gave me one such virtual hug… Without the storms and darkness, we aren’t able to have or appreciate the calm or the light in life. I really believe that both are necessary, and that product of both is a life that is collectively more (far more!) beautiful than it is not. . .


“Progress, not perfection” as it goes… I don’t have a right to judge myself or anyone else – I know deep down that I try to be better each day, and I know (in advance) that I won’t always be able to make that mark. In spite of human flaws and fragility, I see so much good in the world. Through the words and support of others, I also have the comfort of knowing I am not alone, and that the personal difficulties I have weathered in my own life (or how I have been affected and altered by those experiences) are also not so strange and unusual. In fact, far from it…

Some days I need a spiritual hug. Others, I require room to breathe… Overall, though, patience, positivity, and understanding are always welcome, and I’m thankful to have that in my life. What a joy to know that the journey is one we never have to make alone, and that the darkness will always give way to light.

Let Go Of *Should

“Should” is dangerous.  It looks perfectly benign, and wasn’t exactly something I grew up thinking deeply about – it’s just a word after all.  Right?

“Should,” however, can quickly turn into trouble when we apply it to our situation, for example.  “I should have more money by now,” “I should have reacted differently,” I shouldn’t have studied ____ in school…now it’s too late,” or “I should have listened to so-and-so.”

Life is a journey – we are all presented with circumstances, joys, challenges, and opportunities as they are meant for us. . . I sincerely believe we are precisely where we need to be.

If we had more money, maybe it would be at the expense of our own self-worth, or our family’s happiness.  If we reacted differently to a stimulus, perhaps that resultant, and positive opportunity, would not have been made available. If we didn’t study what we had, perhaps we’d not have come to the realization that we are best suited for another area.  If we listened to so-and-so, maybe we wouldn’t have made the mistake that finally put us on a path to recovery…

There are so many “what-if”s and if we play too much with them in our minds, we neglect all the blessings we have in front of us.  To say should” imposes on reality the idea that we are not where we should be… And yet there are so many circumstances where we find our lives falling right into place, rather miraculously.

When we use “should” with respect to ourselves, it can become much more than a word – when we say things like “I should have known better,” or “I shouldn’t be ________” we are adding a layer of self-judgement to the mix.  It becomes less about a word, and more about an attitude – and when we use words with respect to ourselves, we begin to believe them….

None of us are perfect. . .and that’s okay. There is no “right way” to be, neither a flawless mold to which to adhere.

Each of us is on a unique path, and we are – even when it seems otherwise – right we are meant to be.  When we view our world from this lens, we bring the present back into focus, diminishing the anxieties, worries, self-imposed judgments and falsities that the brain likes to dwell on when we revisit our past…or project into the future.

Including “should” in our conversations with ourselves begins to erode our self-confidence – it can do so not only unbeknownst to us, but at a frighteningly rapid pace.  To let go of the notion allows our inner dialogues to remain healthy, and as we are a reflection of the divine around us (whatever that means to you) those words we speak about ourselves matter.

Our lives are like flowers whose petals must unfold as they – and Nature – are ready. To rush them is to destroy the life itself, whether directly or on a more, shall we say, spiritual level.  

Allow yourself the room to BE without the confines of “should” – even when life feels askew, remember that the last time it felt that way, the cycle came whirling back around to everything-is-okay.  

And…it will be. ❤

Nutrition Humor – Sweeteners

So I can’t say that I actually DO do this… I don’t.  But it is pretty damn hysterical, and I actually laughed out loud. . .

None of it is *really* “good for you,” let’s just face the music, shall we?  Probably more peaceful for us to accept it together. If not. . .some health guru might be judging you behind your back. . .

 

True Friendship

A friend of mine had a rough 2015 and, towards the end of it, the opportunity presented itself for him to adopt a kitten.  He had cats in the past but learned to love his freedom after being single, and pet-free, for a long while.

“I think it’s a sign,” I said.

He was skeptical but engaged me in the conversation.

“Animals have such a power to heal, and to help us evolve spiritually… The always seem to come at the right time, too, as if the Stars conspired to bring us companionship,” I continued.  My gut felt like it was something he needed.  Any Empaths in the group will understand!

He courteously entertained my thoughts on the topic and went home to mull it over.  While the kitten was given all his vaccinations and properly cared for, my friend opened his heart to the possibility…

Sure enough, he met the little boy and fell completely in love.  The miracle in all of it as that a week later he said, “I realized last night that things that used to bother me DON’T anymore…  I used to be stressed about having an animal running around but it’s okay now.  I feel like a new person..!”

My heart lit up because I understand just how profound the statement was for this individual.  Not only has he become more accepting, but he is happier, and he is free – he is no longer bound by self-imposed anxieties (ones we often fail to see when we are in our own World.)

Animals have a way of helping us step outside ourselves – we have the responsibility to care for them, first and foremost, so suddenly they become a priority.  They are our friends, and family, and somehow manage to show up right when we need them.    

It is true, unconditional friendship.  There are no grudges, no misplaced anger.  There’s no jealousy or snappy attitudes…just love.

Animals remind remind us what it is like care, to open up, to be vulnerable without judgement.  They open our hearts and expand our minds…  

“It is the start of many beautiful things.  You’ll see.  It’s all going to fall into place,” I said.

“You know what?” he replied.  “I think you’re right!”

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Mandalas and Mantras – I AM Beautiful

I came across this book – Coloring Book, Mandalas and Mantras, by Robert Martin – in The Letters Of Gratitude and wanted to share…

Why a share a coloring book for adults, a seemingly odd (and  unconventional) proposition to some?

Because too many adults have lost their Magic.

In my mind, the tragedy is that everyone is capable of living a Magical Life, and manifesting good things.  

Over the years we become conditioned – by challenging circumstances, tough relationships, unprocessed (or inappropriately processed) memories.  We begin to use words and phrases like “not good enough,” “unattractive,” “can’t…”  All dangerous and untrue.

Our conversation with ourselves, as they say, IS a conversations with the Universe.  How we treat ourselves manifests the same vibration elsewhere.  So taking time for US…getting to know and LOVE ourselves, is of the utmost importance.  It must come before anything (and everyone) else.

I could write for hours on the subject, but to be more concise, what I LOVED about this book’s concept is that it is intended to slow us down.

It allows us to unleash our creative…

To sit with a mantra which, as we illuminate it’s form with the colors our heart feels “fit,” we repeat to ourselves.

“I am beautiful.”  

“I am beautiful.”

 “I am beautiful.” 

It allows us to revert to an activity which, in childhood, promoted our sense of freedom, individuality, without judgement.  

That last part is one of the keys – “without judgement.”  I have learned the hard way just how much I judge myself – circumstances may slow things down, but we are in control of stopping, or forging ahead.

Color…without judgement.  

Color…outside the lines if you feel like it.

Color…with the hues that make the most sense to YOU…because it is YOUR magic, YOUR Life, the colors that make you feel good inside.

If you feel like Life has lost it’s Magic, and maybe that things are flying past at far too quick a pace…check out this book and let yourself just BE.

Remember what it was like, and remind yourself how amazing you are, and how good you are at being you. ❤