Forever

The temporal confines of the human existence are but man-made constructs. . .

Depending on what is happening at any given moment in our lives, a single instant can feel as an eternity – both a gloriously utopian endlessness, or a perpetual hell.

Let not the prospect of enduring some abhorrent permanence frighten you, though… We DO have some choice in the matter.  (Certainly the White Rabbit would say we do)!

Regardless of our situation, or the fervid pursuit your deepest fears make upon your wavering mind…we have the choice to still ourselves and focus on the positives in our lives.  (And I’m willing to bet there is much to be thankful for).  When we take a moment to breathe…to recognize we are still able to breathe…we give our system a chance to value “time.”  We can tap into the present and either enjoy the pure bliss of it…or ground ourselves in the midst of fury, allowing our hearts, minds, and bodies to recognize “this too shall pass.”

I personally believe we are where we need to be, that life is ever presenting us with gifts in the form of lessons and experience.  And though some moments are tougher than others, we find a way not only to survive…but to be stronger as a result.

Sometimes a moment is but a second in the eyes of – or at the hands of – the great clock. . .  Sometimes a moment is so beautiful that we wish to capture and bottle it whole, to cherish for every new day we are given.  Others are so dark we try to hold our breath in a prayer that it will vanish as quickly as it came…

In either case, the “deep breath” and a positive thought can help us to attain either… The elongation of the beauty, or a swift, but manageable end to tribulation.  All in one split second.

Breathe

You are so much stronger than you think. 

When you are in the throes of despair, frustration, anger. . .take a moment to b r e a t h e.  

Take a moment – at the hardest time at which TO a breath. Feel…allow…the in…and the out.

Remind yourself within that space that you have accomplished so much more than you are giving yourself credit for.  You have surmounted obstacles at one time that seemed impossible.  You are in charge.

Remember you are a survivor and a fighter and that you will get through it just like you have so many times before.

7 Lessons to Remember When Life Seems to Suck, By Benson Wong

I really appreciated this article by Benson Wong – it just came through to my inbox today via Tiny Buddha, a site I adore.  I get their e-mails regularly, and generally find myself nodding along in agreement – or simply in shared experience – as I read the various stories and entries presented.  What I like is that the authors are real people, from all over the globe, sharing honest experiences…many of which you may find you can relate to.  

I enjoyed Benson Wong’s post because I’m the kind of person who tries to air on the side of the positive.  ALL the time. I can be a real pain in the ass, I have as many flaws as the next human being (if not more!) and I most DEFINITELY have bad days…

BUT. . .

The thing is, as an Empath, I don’t HAVE the luxury of dwelling on the bad – a perpetual focus on the negative (or – FAR worse – adding to it) is a quick trip into depression for me.  I’m okay to admit that – my sensitivity is absolutely a gift, but it’s something I must always remain mindful of, lest my overactive mind, and ultra compassionate heart pull me into some quicktar.  Yes, you read that right (and I made it up!)  It wouldn’t be sand for me.  It would be flat-out TAR.  

This would be me - trying to see the positive, but sinking into a black abyss! http://nachoabyss.com/page/6

This would be me – trying to see the positive, but sinking into a black abyss! http://nachoabyss.com/page/6

But life is stressful some…er…MOST of the time.  There’s a lot going on, ALL the time, and there always will be.  There’s always going to be SOMEthing to feel anxious about, frustrated over, or peeved by.  So having the reminder – or several – in your arsenal is incredibly valuable.

We ALL need to step back, breathe, and remember…especially during those down-in-the-doldrums moments…that things aren’t as bad as they seem, and that we DO have a choice about how to move forward.  

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Changing our focus to the positive can move mountains.  Okay…maybe not literally, that would be a hefty challenge (and frankly highly impressive on a superhuman scale), but you know what I mean.  A positive mindset can shift the energies in your life rather dramatically, and settle your nervous system down enough to realize that villainous “mountain” is not only scalable, but possibly a lot less threatening than you thought.

(C) Jantoo

(C) Jantoo

Best V-Day Ever

Let me be clear – I don’t celebrate Valentine’s Day, and haven’t since I was a little girl making Valentines for my classmates! Why?  I personally disapprove of the notion that other people (let’s be frank, our significant others!) are pressured with an obligation to “do something nice” for us on this specific day of the year.  

To me, the beauty of love is that you appreciate one another EVERY day – it doesn’t matter whether you show your gratitude with a little note or card, doing something to make your husband / wife / boyfriend’s etc day a little bit easier, or just saying “I love and appreciate you.”  The point is that you don’t NEED a designated day to show you care, nor to spoil or shower your lover with affection and appreciation.  

Now that said, if you do celebrate, more power to you and your other half!  There is certainly nothing wrong with enjoying it if you do!

Sunday happened to be a perfect day, though – spending time with my man is always a great day anyway, but we got to indulge in an activity he is incredibly gifted with / passionate about, and one I am eager to learn and also enjoy – target shooting.  

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I LOVE that he has passions and I want always to encourage that he takes time out to enjoy whatever those activities are – supporting each other in what brings personal joy is so important.  I view being able to do that activity WITH him as a gift...and I wouldn’t have wanted to do anything else that day.  ❤

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There is so much about it that I enjoyed, and so much about him that I cherish…  

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I am harder on myself than anyone else I’ve ever met in my Life and as a result, I can ruin a perfectly good time (for me and everyone else!) by holding myself to some absurdly high standard…yes, even as a neophyte (which means, it is okay NOT to be perfect, hello!!!)  He is tremendously patient with me, supportive and encouraging – and honestly, that makes all the difference.  

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I have had the habit historically of overthinking and getting in my own way – taking a deep breath, letting go of unreasonable anxiety, and appreciating (not to forget accepting) the instruction helps me stay grounded and in a “fun” mindset.  

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The whole point is that activities, especially together, are supposed to be fun – an opportunity to learn is a blessing anyway you take it, and when you are learning alongside your best friend?  Really doesn’t get better.  So even though I wasn’t totally aware that it was the 14th (and I wasn’t!), it was a memorable day filled with love and my best friend – I couldn’t have asked for more. ❤