HAPPY FATHER’S DAY!

Much that I love language I find that I’m often stumped when feeling profoundly, as words lack enough “oomph!” to accurately capture what I’m feeling. To quantify the gratitude I have for both my parents is – also – nigh impossible, because neither is there an appropriate measure.  

I wouldn’t be where I am if not for both of them – no matter the crazy, quirky, dark or dreary, offbeat, or downright terrible things I’ve done along the way, they supported me wholly (sometimes they even join in – as evidenced below. 🙂 )  

They embrace and love me no matter what, and have demonstrated the ultimate selflessness time and time…and time…again in doing whatever they could to help me achieve my dreams…

They’ve taught me so many valuable lessons, allowed me the space to learn my own (equally as vital!), and instilled a sense of strength that has helped me through some horribly challenging times.


Not a day goes by that I don’t appreciate what they have done, still do for me, and how much they accept and value who I am. I feel blessed and thankful that both myself and my husband can have such a close and happy relationship with them, and that we get a chance to see one another despite all moving on in life.  

Blessed and beyond. ❤

 

The Power Of I Love You

Never stop saying “I love you” – to hear those words can alter the course of a day. Or a lifetime.

Never stop appreciating those who make your world brighter, including their quirks, differences, eccentricities…even those qualities that irk you from time to time.  Remember to let them know in words and actions…

Often.  

Hold their hand just because.  Kiss them when they least expect it.  Give them a hug, or leave them a positive note, or just call to say “hello.” 

The “little things” have the power to alter the deepest pain, fiercest anger, and most pressing frustrations.  They remind us of our blessings when we lose sight of them, and they remind those we love that they are valuable in this life…in our life.

Life is precious, and so very fleeting – Love is a gift to cherish, but above all to share and express.  To “give back” ensures that what time we – and our loved ones – do have is lived to the happiest full. ❤

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Be Kinder

Kindness needs to start with YOU.  

Being kind to others is nigh impossible if you have nothing positive to give yourself. . .

When you do find self-love, compassion, and appreciation. . .then you are like an inextinguishable candle that can light the world without losing in the process.

It’s okay if you aren’t there yet.  I get reminders often that I’m being too tough on me.  And I appreciate that, because it’s true.  I’m so thankful and blessed, and I love to give…but I need to remember that the fuller I am, the more I have to offer.

The world needs more of it anyway – positivity is contagious, just like laughter.  And who doesn’t want that?!

Taking a Moment With Mindfulness

Many years – moons ago, it seems –  I was introduced to the concept of “mindfulness.”  I’d been practicing mindfulness most of my life without realizing it…and I hadn’t realized, because I’d not always *quite* had the hang of it. Still, I was vastly more spiritual than I had words to explain, and my ever-wandering mind, and proclivity for all thing magical, led me – both knowingly and not – down the path.

After at least a decade and a half of Alexander Technique, Craniosacral and Somatic work, EMDR, Brainspotting, Martial Arts, and countless spiritual endeavors, I fumble a little bit less. . .  But I’m still learning, and have leagues yet to go – lifetime pursuit, as so many things are.

But it isn’t required that we are necessarily graceful with it.  Fluidity comes with consistency, and mindfulness is very much a way of life.  It is therefore a quotidian ritual of sorts that we evolve with, and as a result of –  to expect mastery instantly is almost an injustice, as the (sometimes clumsy!) journey is what facilitates learning at the deepest levels.  It’s not unlike meditation – widely known to be a challenge at first – as it becomes smoother with time.

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Life these days feels intensely hectic – I want to say more so than ever but I’ve only know this Earth, and time, for 38 years!  The influx (and imposition – *cough* *cough* social media!) of technology has created a reality in which “connectivity” is at the ultimate high. 24/7, to be exact.  There are many blessings born of such advances, but there are also massive changes afoot – ones which I daresay are reprogramming human beings at the most fundamental level.

We are all born with a magical capacityALL of us.  We all have the ability to tap into the same natural resources that have allowed us to survive as a species from the beginning of time.  But it feels frighteningly apparent that even children – generally more adept at awareness than overly-conditioned adults – are also losing the ability.  

It isn’t just about looking down at a phone while crossing the street – awareness out the window and then some!  It’s also in losing the ability to “read” others – the read the non-verbal cues, to FEEL, to SENSE… Children drown nearly as much in the virtual world these days, to the degree that even THEY don’t see the full picture anymore… 

Scary thought…

The good news?  That extra-sensory ability never truly goes away.  What’s happening is more that we are – byproduct of a civilized, modern society – conditioned OUT of our natural abilities.  Our senses become duller because who needs to be aware of danger when getting dinner involves takeout, or benign shopping aisles?!  

Oh, and that “6th” one?  It gets completely shrouded by all the noise.  Sadly, modern man somehow thinks a 6th sense is actually supernatural.  Ever notice that animals have it?  Right…well. . . *reminder* : we ARE animals.  We have it too.  Just —> noise, noise, noise! 

Enter mindfulness.  

The practice of mindfulness brings back the precise moment in time in which we find ourselves.  For me, it is seeing each letter as I type my words, hearing myself speak them as they form, seeing the pause of my fingertips, hearing the  music that is playing in the background…

Human beings have always projected ahead, and reflected on the past – for instance, planning a hunt to gather food, and drawing the hunt on the walls of a cave after the fact.  But nowadays, that practice is so multi-fold that stress tends to weasel its way in to the process, leaving us frazzled and forgetful of the moment we are actually IN.

When we DO take a deep breath…and take the moment in…our heart rate actually slows down with us.  Our very life force, how about that?

Mindfulness is the place in which perspective is purest, in which our emotions no longer control us (this is a wonderful practice for anger and the anxiety-prone), in which our innate magical abilities awaken.

It can have other great effects too – we might actually enjoy our food, eat less instead of devouring (I’m guilty of that!) It gives stress a swift kick for a time too (something we all need!) Mindfulness can catch us in the act of judging, or just before an argument that we needn’t have… It helps us to become better all around.

Mindfulness is like the free gift of wizardry!  We have the power to create, to subdue, to awaken, to affect, to manifest, and to see.  Our feelings are deeper, our heart unfolds, and suddenly. . ?  It’s like we are truly alive.

At a time of the year when life is particularly stressful – and focused on the superficial in many ways – take a moment (or, better…SEVERAL) and relax into your breath. 

Feel.  

Sense.  

BE.

The magic will do the rest.

Blessed be,

❤ 

Thursday Flowers. . .

I went downstairs to pick something up the other day, and there was a nest with Autumn flowers waiting for me, with a note from my husband to wish me a happy Thursday. . .

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Since the day we met, his thoughtfulness has melted my heart – there is no gesture, large or small, that I do not appreciate fully.  

Love those in your life fearlessly, and with all you have.  Take any opportunity you can get to say

“thank you,

“I love you,” and…

“I appreciate you.”  

Life is precious…and far too fleeting…not to cherish what you have in every moment.

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There will not be a day so long as I breathe and live that I will not harbor an immense gratitude for everything he does, and all that he is…  And there will never be a day that I stop making sure he knows. Relationships may evolve in time, but love never has to lose its vibrant aura.  

 

When Life Gives Lemons…He Got Flowers…

Last week was a busy, terribly trying week for my fiancé.  Most people would bring that home with them… It could be in the form of silence, and deliberate distance.  It could be worse, like yelling or taking out frustrations…

Instead, though, he sent me flowers.  Sunny, happy-faced, yellow blooms to say thank you…just because.

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I cannot speak for the masses, but I can speak for myself, from a heart brimming with gratitude.  The thought ALONE is one that makes my eyes well up with tears – I’d be lying if I said I don’t have them as I type.  For most of my Life (in fact, for ALL of it where significant others were concerned until he crossed my path) I’ve never known someone to be so aware, so caring, so kind…and so thoughtful.  

When we love, we always do our very best to support our partners – Life is complicated and riddled with challenging days.  But even then, days can bring us down. When we are in a partnership, remembering that another heart is at stake – and that we don’t always know everything that took place that day – is vital.  As they say, people are always fighting a battle you know nothing about.

Knowing that I am as hopelessly flawed as the rest, I accept that I will make mistakes, cause frustrations, and maybe not always be able to right a bad day.  But I will always try – if nothing else – to let my love know that he is appreciated, and that I notice the efforts and kindness put forth.

How honored and blessed and touched I felt to see these “Life gives you lemons, and lemons bloom” beauties…

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Appreciating Family and Fresh Food

I had the wonderful fortune to spend time with my parents, an uncle, and my sisters this past weekend.  My fiancé had not been to the island – ACK, to be clear – so it was a special treat to share a childhood haunt…and many fond memories and traditions…with him.

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A gorgeous ship in the harbor (prompting pirate accents when we saw it!)

We were there only two days and my heart really sank to leave – the combination of vivid memories from my youth, paired with having us all in one place (my brother and sister-in-law were missed!) plucked at my Empathetic heartstrings!  It is always jarring to swap realities for me, and always has been – not to the point I can’t do it, just that it takes a little adjusting (incidentally, it appears this is a common problem for folks – google it and see!) I truly, however, appreciated every moment while I was there.

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Harvested, fresh clams…er, the shells!

One of our traditions is going out to the harbor just before low tide, and taking advantage of the low water levels to snag fresh clams (in season, and within the regulations, obviously.)  I love that the restrictions are in place, lest individuals harvest with gay abandon and upset the ecosystem for their own gain.

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Fresh clams

Once we have a good bushel (or more!) we haul them back in and make two things – clams casino and clam sauce for pasta.  

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Clams casino

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Martelli pasta (the BEST!) with clam sauce

As a clean eater, I actually don’t have either dish (though, in my defense, casino contains cheese, which I – and my stomach – definitely cannot have!)  It is more important to me personally to maintain and achieve my goals, so I’m okay with abstaining.  I always have enough of my own goodies to not feel hungry (my fiance made stir fry chicken and vegetables! 🙂 and I know I will feel better later.

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Fresh candy from the local farm!

That said, I do enjoy the preparation, having all of us together…AND a few steamed clams in olive oil and green tabasco (my uncle’s favorite concoction!)  The most important part of the meal preparation, and devouring, is the time with my loved ones.

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When I reflected on our many summers together, my heart just glowed – sometimes Life goes  too quickly.  Or maybe we are young and aren’t thinking about time marching on as vehemently as it does… But since we all are at a stage where we DO have control of mindfulness, make sure to take the time to stay present (something I work on daily.)  Cherish the moments you have – they make for a mind-blowing tapestry of memories and love.

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❤